Surrounded Alone (War)

Surrounded Alone - Luke Cyr (43 Handicap)

Fight then we flee, attacked from within
Views from the sacred, ambushed in sin
Back to the wall no eyes on my six
Penalized in vengeance unable to fix
Held to the actions from times long ago
Crippled motivation repeated in show
Loyalty is taught, stubbornness in spades
Mind of a madman and how he is made
Tethered in place by love and of heart
Possessing the look and playing the part
Truth in the sadness of the man in mirror
Look past emotions, of anger and fear
Making the turn, on a hope a prayer
Tomorrow or next, i wish could care
Thanks for the lies, and torment to heal
Stuck in a chance, unable to feel

Discussion

This is a poem I wrote in the days leading up to my suicide attempt. When I allowed the darkness to dictate what I thought. Why, you ask? It felt good. It felt logical and it gave me comfort. Knowing I was going to be free of suffering, it was like I was chasing a high. Believe me, if you're out there and think I don't know what I'm talking about, I was suffering. I was so close to evil I could smell its breath. If it wasn't for the love of a friend, I wouldn't be here right now. And if it wasn't for the kindness and respect from family and friends, I wouldn't be where I am today. I am truly blessed and thankful for all of those in my circle of support. And if you're out there and you feel like you have no one, my goal is to pay it forward. Pay forward the love and respect and all the support I was so lucky to receive. So if you're struggling, contact us and let's find you some help.